I can understand suing someone for slander, libel, or chopping your dick off at a Wal Mart, but how the hell can you sue someone for making fun of your name when it’s a fucking monetary value less than a paper promissory note?  The grammatically correct term is 50 “cents” anyway.  There should be a class action lawsuit filed against the asshole for infringing on the cost of a newspaper which I bet fifty cents that he can’t even read.  He should rub two quarters together to hear the sound of his recording career come another two years.  That might not make sense, but what does about this whole incident?

  One day he might be holding a sign at the corner asking for Fifty Cent so he can buy a newspaper to take a shit on.  He should thank Taco Bell for putting his fucked-up name back in the public eye.  Look at what Taco Bell did for Carlos Alazraqui’s career.  He makes me laugh, and not for his name or his Chihuahua voice saying “yo quiero”.  I laughed my ass of when he hit the mime, Ben Garant, in the shins. This nation is fickle, especially when it comes to the “arts” so he might want shut the fuck up and enjoy the ride, which costs fifty cents in front of God’s grocery store.

  While he’s there he might want to get a Hello Kitty temporary tattoo to wear at the next awards ceremony when he’s asking real musicians if they would like a hot towel after taking a leak.  I’m done…and I hope he is too.   P.S. Taco Bell I loved your chili-cheese burritos, please bring ‘em back for fifty cents.